My day started at 4am this morning, not by choice but that’s when my day kicked off….I have no idea why but I thought I’d get on my exercise bike at 6.30am and I did 30 minutes on the fat burner setting.

It must have got my happy endorphins going as getting ready for work I felt great and confident and pulled out another new streamlined outfit that was wayyyyyy outside of my comfort zone of being bright red and also much shorter than I am used it. Regardless, I pushed through the awkwardness and off I went to work in my size 20 dress.

I had so many compliments once again, which I really aren’t used to. I saw a colleague from one of the hospitals today and she even did I double take walking past me telling me that I looked phenomenal.

Looking at this photo the main thing I notice apart from my new found confidence is my shoulders! I actually have normal shoulders as opposed to the big round puffy and neck eating shoulders that I used to have!

Tonight by the time Lachlan has gone to bed it was 7.30 and the last thing I wanted to do was to go the gym, but I pushed through and off I went! Complete in my bright pink pants.

I did 10km on the bike and then 20 minutes hill profile on the cross trainer. I intended to do another 20 minutes on the treadmill but my body was telling me enough tonight you need sleep so it was time to call it a night

The old Holly would have made excuses as to why I couldn’t and shouldn’t go to the gym.

The new Holly just does what needs to be done to be the best version of myself!

Now to decided what new outfit to wear tomorrow 😜

Weigh in Wednesday has rolled around again! Wednesday seems to come around so quickly….

This week – 1.5kg

Since surgery – 53.1kg

Total – 72kg

Loving life, loving my changes, loving my progress, loving the way I am feeling, loving the way I am looking, loving my sleeve!

After yesterday epic gym session I was pleasantly surprised that I felt fine and well enough even to rock out in my heels again at work today.

I had a follow up appointment at lunchtime today with Lilian’s clinic, Lilian was away overseas so I had my follow up with my Bariatric GP (Kiki) so I off I went in my lunch break, I caught a taxi there which was my first little win of the day. I haven’t caught a taxi since February this year and last time I did I had to pretend to do up the seatbelt in the backseat as it didn’t physically fit. Today I clicked it in easily without any dramas at all….NSV victory.

My appointment went really well. It’s started off with her being in awe of my physical transformation asking me to do a twirl of my outfit on the way in so she could see how fantastic I was looking and then went on to compliment me on my new style and confidence she can see in me.

She is very happy that my acute episodes of pain have completely gone and that I am managing with the residual tightness and discomfort without any pain relief. I need to continue with the management plan of lactulose and coloxyl/sennalax at the double dose that I am currently in until I am have daily movements and then gradually scale it back until I find a regular routine. After a fortnight if I still aren’t regular I will need to exchange the oral tablets to movicol but not yet as this can be harsher on my tiny little pouch.

She also did my updated measurements. Since 15 November 2016 I have lost 64cm off my waist and 58cm off my hips and she no longer needed to double up on the tape measure with one length now being around to get around me.

As I was about to leave Kiki then decided to round up all the other staff to show me off on how well I am doing. My heart is full of appreciation for the amazing team at Adelaide Bariatric Centre and full of pride of my own achievements.

As I left I had a whim moment and thought Norwood isn’t that far away from the city, I don’t need to get a taxi back to work…..I’ll walk back instead. It was only 2.3km however I was wearing high heels and I may have gotten slightly lost and ended up walking an extra km than i needed to walk. I wouldn’t have even considered with 1 month ago let alone 8 months ago…..another NSV, even if my feet were screaming WHY HOLLY WHY at me for the rest of the afternoon.

Even with my unplanned walk this afternoon I was intending to go to the gym tonight, unfortunately the little guy didn’t go to bed until nearly 9pm so by then it was way too late for me to go to the gym. There is always tomorrow night.

Today was a big day for pushing myself out of my comfort zone. I had my gym induction personal trainer session today with Anita who set me up with a program and plan to get the best bang for my buck. She was so lovely and encouraging with my progress so far and excited to see my progress moving forwards. She was also impressed with the muscles that I already have that are starting to emerge through the padding and excess skin.

I can not believe I leg pressed 70kg as my starting weight…..but I guess in reality I used to leg press the extra 70kg every day since that is how much I have lost since I started this crazy journey.

Anita really wants to push me outside my comfort zone and to next week commit to doing on class a week. The thought of this is beyond terrifying to me, I like being in my own little bubble doing my own thing. The thought of me being in a big group of people as the one fatty that can’t do everything that I am supposed to be doing makes me feel physically ill. But I guess it’s a bit like the gym as a whole!! I don’t know unless I try.

After my 45 minutes with Anita, I then pushed myself to do a full 3 set rotation of all the exercises finished off with 20 on incline walking on the treadmill spending just under 2 hours at the gym….I mean really who on earth would have EVER thought that I would spend 2 hours in one day at the gym!!

Yup I was hot after and now at the end of the day I’m beyond exhausted and ready to fall into bed for the night…..but will I be able to walk tomorrow?

This morning getting ready for work in yet along new and slim lined clothes and I really noticed the dreaded bat wings. I know some people mention that they are quite small at this stage but to me they are so very noticeable and somewhat bothering. The excess skin is becoming a distinct issue due to chaffing and the distinct hang that I can see like red rag to a bull.

When I pull back the extra skin I can really see how thin my arms are and how good they would actually look without that dreaded hang and I also know that for the last 4 months the centimetres have remained exactly the same without any movement which I know is because these glorious wings.

I know that this is to be expected with a dramatic weight loss, I know I am doing the right exercises to minimise the impact as much as possible but all I can see of this excess skin that starts hanging from my elbow right the way down! Normally in summer I live in sleeveless tops but not sure I will have he confidence to do that now with this wing effect!!

I just need to suck it up and deal with it until I get to my goal and then I can go on the waiting list to get those little suckers chopped off permanently!!!

The end of the weekend and what a great weekend I have had incorporating exercise into my mum life.

We went for a walk this morning to the local duck pond and went for a nice walk….until we got rained on and had to come home quickly.

Then this afternoon we trotted off to the playground this afternoon once the weather passed and the sun was back out again.

Life even 8 months ago was so different and we would have driven to the playground at the end of the street let alone walked to the playground that’s even further away.

I love that my sleeve is making me a better and more active mum and I am so beyond excited to think where am I going to be this time next year!

This sleeve has not changed my life…..my sleeve is a tool that has helped and supported me to make the lifestyle changes that I needed to become the best possible version of myself. This has not at all been an easy way out, nothing about what I have endured has been easy. There has been a lot of blood, sweat, tears and vomit involved but I am proud that I have completely change my life, physically, mentally and emotionally.

Not everything has been smooth sailing I have had to work hard to get to where I am now and every day I have another battle to deal with both big and small however there is not one regret or one doubt in my mind that aside from Lachlan this is the best decision I have ever made. I am becoming the person I have always wanted to become and have always deserve to be.

Actually, my only regret…..not doing it sooner!!! But I guess the universe works in mysterious ways and the reason my time is now is so that all the amazing sleeve sister and brothers that have come into my life wouldn’t have come into my life if I made this decision a lot earlier!

Last night before Lachlan went to bed I promised him that I would take him to the gym playroom in the morning. Oh man on man did I regret my decision to make that promise when I was tired and would have been happy to stay at home……but one little man was very excited to be “going to the play room while mummy exercised”.

My gym buddy really is my best motivation to be the best possible version of myself.

This afternoon I could up with a girlfriend and I had a pair of pants on that I had recently found in my wardrobe only to be told that looked like pyjamas and before we went to dinner and movies it would necessary to go and buy new pants! For the record size 20 pants!!

The girls at work have been giving me loveable grief about my old full length cardigan being way to big and engulfing me like a tent and I have so far resisted the urge to get a new one knowing we will soon be heading to warmer weather however today I was talked into getting a new one…..a size 18!!! I have not owned any size 18 clothes in over 15 years.

It’s safe to say my sizes are rapidly dropping and my 5 bags that are going off to good will have been extended to 7 bags….I seem to have skipped 24’a completely and it feels amazing!!!

Today I reached another milestone in this crazy journey!

I very special person to me for the last six months has been nagging the crap out of me (with love) about my inability to accept a compliment and how I need to get over it and graciously say thank you in return and then actually believe it myself.

There must have been something in the air today as I received not one, not two but eleven that’s right count them eleven seperate people at work comment on how beautiful, phenomenal, gorgeous, thin, healthy, lovely I looked today.

Normally I would have laughed and made some kind of joke about people giving me a compliment like that. Today I simply said thank you!

Several people asked what the occasion was today and I just giggled saying isn’t debuting a new dress enough of an occasion?

Old negative habits still die hard though and I secretly did wonder to myself as I was receiving all these compliments today…..so I normally look that hideous that makes today so good? Hahaha

One step at a time so today I am celebrating the fact that I graciously and sincerely said thank you to received compliments…….without making a joke!

Today I’m feeling like I’m back in the game. My health is on the definitely improve and I’m feeling so much better and nearing back to being pain free completely. My head is in the best place it has been with my eyes actually seeing and believing the changes – even if I do feel like pinching myself occasionally to make sure I am not dreaming.

Today was a day to celebrate as it was the day I got to wear my second goal dress being a size 20 from the standard clothes range. It feels so good to meet these milestones and to stop and celebrate along the way. One of my gorgeous sleeve sisters sent me some before photos of me 1 week after I started Opti and wow I don’t ever remember being so big and uncomfortable looking so thought it was the perfect time to do another side by side comparison.

My belly no longer sticks out further than my boobs and I’m starting to have a defined waist and my shape is in the right ratios. And yes to those who have made comments on my new legs……I can see it now too 😳

After work tonight I got stuck back into the gym. The girls had a giggle as I walked in firstly welcoming me back into my nightly routines but also laughing at me that I am a real gym girl now as I was apparently wearing proper gym leggings with ventilation strips….couldn’t have fooled me, I just bought them because they were cheap, cute and small hahaha

I was in the ladies gym for the first 40 minutes and I had the entire room to myself!

It’s nice to get back into it and tonight I pushed myself more than I have since I have been back doing a mixture of cardio (cross trainer and bike) and weights pushing myself to go up another 5-10kg higher in weight on all the equipment and doing another 5 repetitions in each set.

I’m stuffed now and ready to crawl into bed!!

It’s weigh in Wednesday! This one I had no idea at all what to expect given I gained last week and given I’m well and truly into operational unblock…..but I can honestly say I WAS NOT at all expecting this result!!

This week – 3.1kg

Since surgery – 51.6kg

Total 70.5kg

Only 1.7kg of that is added to my progressive total after last weeks gain but I’m beyond elated with this outcome. Clearly I have managed to move on and evacuate some of my problems and pains as I’m feeling better and more myself everyday.

This week I have cracked two milestones within one week. 50kg since surgery and 70kg on total, I could not even fathom that I would ever be where I am now and be there as quick as I have arrived there. I am now the smallest I have ever been on the 7 years that I have been with Jamie.

Today I am proud of myself and content with where I am right now in life and I’m excited to find out where I will be in the next 1 month, 3 month, 6 months etc. the world is my oyster and I’m worth it.

Today was my first day completely pain relief free, a day without panadol! I still have pains and discomforts but I am able to cope with them.

I went to the shops this morning to get some school supplies for Lachlan I saw a clearance sale in the clothes section, which makes me like a red rag to a bull at the moment. A lot of it wasn’t winter clothes but clothes for when it starts to warm up a bit so I decided to get size 20 and didn’t even both frying them on as I know I’ll need them later down the track. I got them home and thought uni would try them on just for giggles. Well you could knock me down with a feather but they fit……every single one of them fit! They aren’t fit for public appearances yet but they will be in the near future.

Went to the gym again tonight but took it a lot steadier than last night doing 20 minutes light cardio and 30 minutes light weights.

Weigh in tomorrow, I am so very intrigued and nervous to see what the results are going to be!