21 August, 2017
WHMP: 20 August 2017
Today I had a turning point in my mindset all thanks to my photo from last night. This I VERY rare for me to think this and almost unheard of for me to say this but last night I looked damn bloody awesome! I felt amazing, I looked nice, I felt healthy, I felt sexy, I felt happy and most importantly (and very weirdly) I felt comfortable within myself. In all honesty today I couldn’t actually stop looking back at the photo of myself and actually smile and think wow girl look at you. Look at that shape and who knew I actually had a waist.
Feeding off this new found confidence I did something that I have needed to do for a while but have never been in the right frame of mind to do it. Because I am feeling confident within myself I decide that it was time to do a wardrobe cull and get rid of my old frumpy too large clothes. I need to start embracing my new shape and flaunting it with more shapely clothes that fit properly and don’t hang off of me like a sack (or tent).
I find that when I’m getting dressed I keep resorting back to my old clothes because they are comfortable and known to me so I have no eliminated that option but packing them all up and getting ready to send them off to good will for a new home. I was a bit sad to see some of my old faithful tops and dresses be packed up and sent on their way but it’s time for them to be moved on.
In the midst of doing my cull and constantly fighting with trying to keep my pants up I tried something that I have seen people do before but never actually believed that I would be able to go it myself but I can and I did!! All of Holly now fits into one leg of my pants hahaha that’s just ridiculous, there is no other word for it. I didn’t bundle up these pants not only because they weren’t clean but because I am keeping these ones to go with a few other staple pieces for reflection of how far I have come since I started this crazy roller coaster ride.
Health wise I am so very very very happy and relieved that the pain levels and discomfort is starting to ease up. Operation “unload” is well underway and I am definitely starting to clear the backlog and today is the first day that I haven’t needed any pain relief and I could handle the pain without it until about 4pm. This brings me no end of relief both mentally AND physically.
Today has been a real turning point for me and I have felt something click in my brain to know that it’s ok for me to say and feel – damn girl, you are looking damn good and feeling even better AND most importantly you worked hard to get here and you deserve it.